“If you want to go fast, go alone.
If you want to go far, go together.” African Proverb
A few months or a lifetime ago (virus deaths are like dog years), I wrote a blog on the loneliness epidemic.
Americans, in spite of technology, are some of the loneliest people in the world due to too many factors to go into (besides you know most of them). However, this damn demonic disease called “Coronavirus” has increased the loneliness factor to the tenth power. The isolation for many who are in their homes almost full time has become unbearable.
At first blush with boredom in February and then March, I thought, as an introvert, it didn’t seem like my life was much different than pre-virus times. However, March turned to April, “the cruelest month of all,” and April turned into May, then June, and then July, and it became even deadlier. I realized that even though my body likes to stay at home, the forced loneliness and the all but choice-lessness loneliness was getting to me.
It has been too long since I shared caffeine or touched someone or been touched. All my friends, and most of my clients, get and give an unmasked hello and goodbye hug. Most of you reading this (if you’ve gotten this far with my blog-rant) can see the irony given the power of human touch to heal and release endorphins has been researched, recorded, and now removed from everyday life.
Now we all know we can be lonely in a crowd or even in a family. Some people are getting a little testy from sheltering in place and are going crazy for some solitude. The apartments, condos, and even mansions are getting a little too small for some.
Whatever kind of loneliness you might be experiencing, please remember impatience, boredom, nausea, and anger, are all under the umbrella of the virus, and though our fearful leader says it will “one day magically disappear,” it’s not, at least for some time to come. So, try not to make any big decisions, moves, or messes.
This is the time for extreme radical tenderness and compassion with yourself or with those you are staying at home with for the near future. And keep reaching out any way you can – through emails, texts, video chats, remember letters and cards, and for God’s sake, share your feelings of fear and exhaustion with your cabin fever. As James Taylor said, “tell somebody the way that you feel;” and just maybe you’ll feel it beginning to ease.